I would like to write my life’s story sometime, but I keep feeling like it isn’t the right time. Like I’m climbing the mountain and then when I get to the top, I can write about the experience. It just seems like I’m never quite there. There are still so many unresolved areas in my life. I’m waiting to get to the point where I’ve reached the top and now it’s no longer a struggle as I hike along the ridge.
I’m still climbing the mountain.
The top seems just out of sight.
When I’ve lost the weight,
when he has the job,
when bills are not a worry,
when Pearl is not anxious,
when Joey is okay,
when Cliff and Adrienne visit,
when I have a degree,
when everything is perfect.
Then I’ll have something to say,
then I’ll be worth listening to,
then the music will start,
then words will flow,
then the guilt and shame will flee,
then I’ll be worthy,
then I’ll soar,
then I’ll rebuild the walls,
Then I can begin.
Very Interesting…. So much has been accomplished in you, you have grown so much…. yet you continue to look at the mountain top for a measure. You are so much more, so much better off, so much of an inspiration to those who know you, so much so much….yet you seem to to see so little so little… YOU ARE AN INCREDIBLE PERSON THAT, WHILE NOT ALWAYS UNDERSTOOD OR APPRECIATED PROPERLY, ARE – VERY MUCH LOVED!
I miss our times together (not the fighting as kids but) just hanging together. I really love you my friend, cousin, my sister! Keep plugging away and remember that often sungs arent sung until the music begins, poetry not written til the pen begins to move upon the paper….. you are already writing and singing your song my dear! DO NOT PUT YOURSELF DOWN! YOU HAVE COME A LONG LONG WAY!!!! I love you.
Thank you Larry. I love you too. What I’m finding is the more I grow, the more I see how much I have to grow – if that makes sense. What I need to do is figure out how to enjoy the journey:-) I’m getting better at that.